Well wow
Who is that username writing a journal in your watch feed? I surely could've done it the new hip way with writing a smallo status post but the thing with those tricky establishments is that unless you preserve their specific links or wisely save them in your inbox there's virtually no way you can find them afterwards should you so desire. Plus I figured I haven't written a human journal here for literally
years and this feels so
alien now like you wouldn't believe! Journal skins, what are these? Why? Where should we even put them to use in these times of twitter and sweet instant messengers?
Nevertheless I'm writing a real DA-journal to commemorate several turning points (the journal being one among them as well
More recursion to the gods of recursion!
). It is
Easter day today within the cultural and geographic context I'm living in, hence I figured this could be nice I performed that
rite of name-changing on this very day. It seemed mighty appropriate -
the rebirth and the resurrection. And you know what - the experience was so NERVOUS. The heart rate increases, the breathing becomes excited - heaven witness I've never done this before (on this account) and am I really sure I'm ready to let go?
Well, it's done and gone (never fully, of course - the amount of images with watermarks and links plastered on them with no remorse - that is positively overwhelming), and I'm here with a wondrous feeling around me of having gotten
back into my own skin. This is absolutely glorious - especially so after having spent years so
off-key - so I suppose one can only experience this sense of
returning, of
coming back home - when discovering a name that calls
from within, a name that answers whatever inquiry you pose for it to be answered.
It started out
as a kiss way back in early 2014
(I'd guess sometime in spring, add to that my intense reading of ASOIAF and you get the overall mood for the day and perspectives) - where I got those first hints of the username
not fitting anymore - I admit this motley crew funfair equipment was super handy and timely and
relatable back in 2012~2013 - with all the jazz and jokes and the events we've partook in here, but later on this was suddenly
not enough. Not fitting, too small, too narrow, wrong in mood and destination. This began as minor inconvenience and was slowly but inevitably expanding into the sense of
not belonging.
Like you've grown out of your smart
snakeskin and in a desperate need for an appropriate and fitting change. Despite the name and icon change my love for Orochimaru
isn't going anywhere
The Serpent is just too wise to not appreciate his certain traits, the ability to change skin among them.
And so the quest begins
The real trick is that a name is
important. At least I couldn't agree to anything that wasn't big enough to make one
dream, to make one STRIVE and remember of all the fantasies and journeys that are culture, magic, mythos and everything intermingling within them. The best way to describe what I strived for in a name can be achieved via reading through/listening to Tuomas Holopainen's lyrics - both old and new. Have you ever read through
Shudder Before The Beauitful? By all means I invite you to. This is what perfectly describes the image I wanted to have with me at all times - as a name is most definitely an image, something you envision, consciously or not, a something that provides certain context and colour, and sound and emotion and all those synesthetic wonders.
And there the song welcomed us to the endless
journey - of humanity on the planet, and of the planet itself. The journey,
the source of the tale (IMAGINE, just imagine the way it FEELS), the nebulae glowing, the magic so palpable it makes you wanna
cry out of sheer beauty - maestro Tuomas knows his word-bending. It was something cosmic, something from his and also Adam Young's and Tom DeLonge's songs (have you ever heard AVA's
Young London?
Every breath makes a thunderous sound, and one cannot ever count all the times their lyrics brought BACK the desire to live and to CREATE) - you'd wonder where're all the ladies?
The ladies know way too much pain - take the lyrics of First Aid Kit, or Coeur de Pirate, or Alanis Morissette (you shouldn't, though, she the real Empress of pain) - a pain too
real to soar into the skies, a pain that holds you back, and pain that helps you remember and appreciate, a pain that basically makes you human, yeah - but pain nonetheless. So it was about
fighting dreamers this time, about an imagery of something that is
BEYOND, something grand and giving both peace and
serenity and
sense of wonder to the beholder.
Not an easy task, I admit. Not easy to the point of having spent literally years to find a fitting spell for the wordbending. I did discover a name I would want to go by with my original artworks, ironically, back in the native language - yet the question with this place remained open (all the memories and the actual artistic path - the sheer amount of info) - there had to be a transitioning period of learning to live with different connotations to the nickname. The previous one served well since the year 2005 when I first invented it, and totally deserved a fine successor.
The irony intensified when I realized I'm back to basics
- read: to
Nightwish's earlier songs. One cannot count the actual amount of HOW MUCH this group has influenced my style (not just art, but also the manner of
perception, I suppose - all those effervescent sparks of magic you may or may not account for existent - making their way into the synesthetic
feast that are Nightwish's songs
) - and once more they've provided the
exact context I've been searching for. And to think that
Oceanborn is 20 years old this year!
Need I name the song where solar sea originates from?
Or do you guess it?
Everything in 4 and a half minutes, the wishes, the infinite space
, the lifetimes transitioning one into another - and the fairytale, the fairytale that keeps on unraveling (akin to WT's
Never-ending Story). Add to this the ever so accurate
Sorrow has a human heart (does it not?) for all the splendid angst parades in the subjects of my drawings (I never invited them - yet they chose to arrive and manifest themselves, without fault) - and we get the complete visionary image.
It's actually both nicely ironic and touchingly sweet to have even
two seas at one's behest
The first one being that of synesthetic texturesque experiences,
synesthesea - my
stock account for another plane of
reality abstraction - and now this one, filled with sunlight both visible and hidden beneath the waves. I wonder if I lived somewhere with 300+ sunny days a year and wasn't that sun-deprived
- would I've chosen this sort of a name?
But alas, sun-deprivation together with colour deprivation have been a natural part of environment here, and this is a very personal desire to have at least a vision - a dream - a wonder of a sunlit sea somewhere near (us extreme inland creatures, I suppose, have dreams that are absolutely incredible to the inhabitants of the shorelines and neighbouring areas
)
And solar sea also adds to the general feeling of where I'm heading to, art-wise. A sense too complex for words yet - and not exactly being caught by my present skills (I reckon the trick is in trying, relentlessly) - yet this is it, yes, surely. Something
inbetween the rays of sunlight, the wind carrying the waves, the freshness of the breeze and its enchanting, motivating song, the waters heavy and dark and infinitely deep - yet becoming
transluscent and
glowing with the entrance of sunlight, the texture uneven and ever-changing, dynamic in the utmost possible emanation,
flowing, telling a story of elements and feelings and their
unity - the sea reflecting starfall cosmic legends, who knows what they are?
The fairytale in our hands
[am listening to Oceanborn's 1998's Stargazers rn and thus am going through a sense of overwhelmingly deep emotional experience]
If you're quite new here (and have read this post to this very place - omg, but thank you!) - you can call me Sea
If you've been here on this journey with me for the past years - be welcome to call me however you're more used to
And don't you miss Orochimaru, the master immortal ain't goin' anywhere
Still some arts of him to be posted here one day. So the story keeps on going
Thank you for staying with me, folks
#showyourheart #oldkingdom #garthnix #kttk
Mostly for giggles and no particular info but heeey 
But with doubled 'r' because double consonants are so beautiful 
Why, it's been in my signature since day one, as open for interpretations as possible
Ones that now appear oldest aren't the first ones.
, there're things I absolutely NEED to say 
], but better late than never, right? hence - thanks a lot for thy birthday congratulations, I'm so very touched! 
] 
- and given the complete inability to predict such outbursts, I should say, I'm all the more inclined to move to other art platforms.
], however a lot of talented musical artists have created extremely reliable answers and explanations to what has actually happened.
We listen to the agonizigly bittersweet and beautiful songs and quietly gaze at all the parallels they unintentionally create to what we've had the misfortune of witnessing just about yesterday-the day before.
Fellow friends, watchers, guests and sympathizers! 